“Give your hands to serve and your hearts to love “
I wake up early every morning before my kids to have some quiet alone time and get myself prepared spiritually for my day. In the 2 months following our last placement’s departure, my heart had been yearning. It is a funny feeling really, it was almost like I wanted 3 kids in the house. Over these years of fostering the capacity in my heart for loving kids in our home has grown, but I knew I didn’t want to have another child biologically.
I had a feeling DCYF would call me that day. It is hard to describe. After I picked up my son from school and saw my phone ringing with DCYF’s caller ID on it, I was not one bit surprised. It is almost like I was expecting the call.
“Hi, Amanda. I have a potential placement for you. She is a 3 year old girl.”
Easiest yes we have had yet.
I was expecting the call, she was in our specific age range, and I was totally ready.
Unfortunately she was coming from out of our district, which means there were no homes for her (or her 2 brothers) near their hometown. She would need to commute one hour.
She finally arrived after everyone’s bedtimes had past, 9:30pm. When the worker took her out of her car seat, my heart was overwhelmed. She looked so similar to my daughter. I was flooded with compassion as I could visualize my daughter being in her shoes and how terrified she must be feeling. She came into our home wearing clothes that were too small, hair that was wild and tangled, and big blue eyes.
She brought with her nothing.
In fact the workers told us that the clothes she had on were from the office.
She was very loud and it took a good hour for her to calm down and relax before she was ready for bed. Finally, laying down in her new bed as I rubbed her back she began a very soft heartbreaking weep.
Heartbroken. I kissed her head and told her she was safe and that I was so glad she was here. A phrase that I repeated to her nightly to the point where she also randomly said it to me too.
These past 5 months have been full of growth for her. Her speech has come such a long way and she no longer yells every time she speaks. She is much more calm and she has amazing manners. She really is such a joy. Always so cheerful.
Her brother’s foster parents decided that they could indeed take her into their home as well and so she moved in with her brother. Although we are so happy for her and the reunification of a part of their family, we are also grieved.
Her and my daughter became great friends. Over these 5 months they have spent so much time together playing and got along so well. They even got to celebrate each other’s 4th birthdays together (they are only 2 weeks apart).
We will definitely miss our sweet joyful girl.
Almost half a million children are in foster care right now.
118,000 kids are free and clear, floating in the system, waiting to be adopted.
Every year over 20,500 kids age out of foster care without reunifying with their families or ever being adopted.
For more information about foster care in NH head here.
For more earth shattering United States Foster Care statistics click here.